Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Having an imaginary relationship with a flickr person. (Stalking ?)

This tutorial/manual will go over the very basics of stalking someone on flickr. It's simple, and you can't get herpes from flickr. I have lots of reasons for doing what I do, but I figured it's more interesting, how I do what I do. There is only one strict rule to this "game", DO NOT MAKE CONTACT - YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING MOST PEOPLE CONSIDER CREEPY AND UNNACCEPTABLE. No matter how endearing you believe you are, you aren't. You're just a creep. It's best to be a happy alone creep. Or a broken depressed alone creep....without a restraining order.

Look through flickr for a subject, you might want to start on the Most Recent Photo page. It's best to choose someone with at least 1000 photos. Don't watch the videos at first, I'll talk about videos in closing. Look through every photo, and extract information. Sometimes it will be blatant, like a skyline you recognize revealing the place they are at. Sometimes things will be subtle, always look for writing in the background. Any sort of information that might reveal more about there personality, habits, hobbies, medications, and work(More about medications below). Pay attention to things like, what tv shows and books are in the background, or what programs are running on there computer, and if you get a picture of the dock or the task bar, study it for things you can figure out about them, like creative programs, like photoshop or Reason. Often times you will get pictures of food, a good indication of diet, let's you know if there vegan or on a macrobiotic diet or whatever. Are they messy, are they neat? Keep notes in a notepad/TextEdit.app/gedit file, if you have a bad memory.

Adding them as a contact on flickr, or favoriting a photo, is probably okay, just for your convience of finding their page...however, favoriting 500 of their photos is not ok. Dead give away you're a weirdo. You don't want to be on the radar, no matter how much you think you do.

If you divine there real name from the photos, or account info, use pipl.com to do a search this will reveal all there other online accounts. If you don't have there name use there flickr screen name to search on other social networks. Last.fm is my favorite because I can compare musical tastes. Some social networks, like facebook, etc are to revealing about the person to have an idealic imaginary relationship with them, so stay away from these.

The best place to look up what medications is always google, just don't go to the pharmaceutical companie's website about the drug, that's never interesting, you want a wikipedia site or medical site. By the way, if you just get a shot of the pill imprint code, the best place to look that up on is rxlist.com. Of course the best way to glean information from medications is just being familiar with drugs in general, and if you're reading this you probably have a pharmocopia your self, so that shouldn't be an issue.

If you see that they have a boyfriend, or girlfriend, just innundate that person with horrible qualities, and pay particular attention to shots, were they are together but unhappy.


Ok this guide was awesome...so awesome in fact now I'm madly passionately in love with this person, what the fuck did you do to me? FIX IT!

Ok so this is what the videos are for, video's are the fastest thing to help you find faults in someone. Like a horrible southern drawl you didn't expect. Go through the pictures one more time and look for things that just annoy the piss out of you. Like something they wrote that was incredibly unclever, or conji tattoos. Or look at that endearing picture of her crying, and think "That's just a crazy crying bitch, would hate to deal with her shit all the time". It helps

Is this healthy?
Probably not, no.

Are there advanced techniques not included in this manual/tutorial?
Yes, but it's probably unethical to post them on the intarwebs.

Why the focus on Medications?
Usually people who have thousands of pictures of themselves publically available online, have a screw loose. I mean look at me for fuck's sake.

Any practical applications for this "game" ?
I guess if one were so inclined, by building scenarios in your head, like seeing your subject at a fair and then implanting yourself at the fair and thinking about the fun you would have would be it's own reward. Ok not really, but something it would help with, is if you had to lie on the spot about a whole day or thing that happened. With the memory of pictures you can add a level of detail and complexity to your lies that make them very believable.

Why would I do that?
You're reading a post on a hacker culture blog, about having a fake relationship with someone who has a flickr account....I'm pretty sure fucked up shit happens to you a lot, and some of that probably involves lieing.

Why do you do this?
I have problems...lots and lots of problems, and it's pretty much a good thing I never meet these people.

You're a fucking psychopath.
That's not a question.

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